FEELINGS
We used to believe that it was depression that made people think negatively, but psychologists and psychiatrists have discovered that most people who struggle with depressed feelings first had negative, pessimistic, distorted thoughts that produced those depressed feelings. People often have completely different reactions to the same situation. For example, John and Jack both heard their basketball coach say, "Every one of you guys has to work harder on defense. You're just standing flat-footed when you are guarding your man!" John thinks, "The coach is trying to help us win. I better step up my energy on defense." But Jack thinks, "He's blaming me for our losing this game. I feel responsible for our team's failure. Coach is going to bench me soon because he thinks I'm a loser." Then Jack goes out on the basketball court and feels depressed and dejected, making more defensive errors because his mind is not guarding the opponent. As you can see, bad thoughts lead to depressed feelings.
1. Study the list of types of negative thinking patterns that have been identified and defined and that are common to people who suffer from depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem.
| Type | Definition | Example |
| Black or White | Viewing situations, people, or self as entirely bad or entirely good-nothing in between |
Paul made and error while playing on the school's basketball team. He began Thinking, "I'm a total failure. Nobody will like me. Everyone will hate me. |
| Exaggerating | Making self-critical or other critical statements that include terms like never, nothing, everything or always |
Sharon was not asked on a date for the junior prom. She thought, " I'm never going to be asked on a date. Nobody cared about me. Boys will always ignore me. |
| Filtering | Ignoring the positive things that occur to and around self but focusing on and inflating the negative. |
Kate had her hair cut short and styled differently. After receiving several complaints from friends and family, one person was mildly critical. Kate thought "I knew I shouldn't have gotten it cut short. I look like a freak. People are laughing at me. " |
| Discounting | Rejecting positive experiences as not important or meaningful |
Tyler was complimented by his teacher for his interesting artistic drawing. He thought, "anybody could have drawn that. She doesn't anything. I don't have any special ability. " |
| Catastrophizing | Blowing expected consequences out of proportion in a negative direction. |
Sue did not make the cheer leading team after working hard in tryouts. She though, " my life is over. I'll never have any friends or any fun. People will look down on me." |
| Judging | Being critical or self or others with a heavy emphasis on the use of "should have, ought to, must, have to, and should not have" |
John finally got up enough courage to call a girl from school that he liked. In spite of the fact that they had a lively conversation for 20 minutes, John told his friend, "I shouldn't have laughed so much. I have to be more relaxed or she'll think I'm a jerk." |
| Mind Reading | Making negative assumptions regarding other people's thoughts and motives |
Aaron had a problem with acne. When he did not get the clothing sales job he wanted, he thought, "I know it's because the manager thinks I look bad. He said the position had been filled but I know better." |
| Forecasting | Predicting events will turn out badly |
Kelly finished taking an important test. She immediately predicted that she failed. "I'll never get into college, because I blew it here." |
| Feelings are Facts | Because you feel a certain way, reality is seen as fitting that feeling |
Jim did not have plans with his friends this weekend. He felt lonely and inferior. He thought, "no one likes me. I have a terrible personality." |
| Labeling | Calling self or others a bad name when displeased with a behavior |
Brent had an argument with his parents about not cleaning his room. he thought, "my parents are dictators. They are always telling me what to do." |
| Self-Blaming | Holding self responsible for an outcome that was not completely under one's control. |
Lisa's parents separated after many months of arguing. She thought, "my parents argue so much because of me. If I acted better they wouldn't have to separate. |
| 2. Now that you know 11 common types of distorted thinking, apply this information to you own way of thinking. List at least three examples of your own thoughts that lead you to feeling depressed and anxious. First, describe the event that prompted you to feel depressed and then describe that thoughts that promoted the bad feelings. |
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3. It is important to try to replace
negative, distorted thoughts with positive, more realistic thoughts
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